Dev Diary 2: Problems Learning (Project Aquarius)

I have been working hard to try and find a way to make all my dreams come true with this game.  I have given it a project name now:  "Project Aquarius"  This has nothing to do with the final project but I thought it would be better to give it a name rather than keep referring to it as, "my game."  I have realized that the biggest problems that I am facing right now is the lack of knowledge that I currently have.  I am not afraid to learn but I do feel that I am trying to learn too much too fast and that I am not giving myself time to slow down and have fun with the exploration of the new software that I have been working within.  That being said I keep changing and updating my to do list, so here is the newest version of said list.  We will be updating it and adding project samples as I get a little more down for the game itself.

To Do:

• Finish the Unity Tutorial series
• FPS
• Cart Game
• Sandbox
• RPG
• Scripting
• Finish the Intro to Blender Tutorial
• Level 1
• Level 2
• Level 3
• Level 4
• Title Screen
• Artwork
• Coding
• Asset Creation
• Main Character
• Male
• Female
• Character Allies
• 2 for pre alpha build
• Mobs
• Outer
• Inner
• Manor
• Boss
• Animations
• Scripting First Level

Started:

• Loot Tables
• Abilities
• Mechanics Rough Sketch

Finished:

• Monster Stat sheet for Outer Mobs
• Rough Outline of Demo Zone
• Demo Classes

I know that for most of you this will mean absolutely nothing, but I am excited to keep updating it and making it work as we continue to grow through this development process.  I can say that I have a better appreciation for folks that work in the industry and hopefully I will be able to add my stamp to it in some way.  If nothing more than detailing a game project from start to finish.  

Game Dev Diary 1

Today I have taken my first steps towards building this amazing game, I have started to play around with a 3D modeling program to learn a bit about how to make nodes and I have downloaded a few different game developer tools.  One, godot, is very code heavy and has a steep learning curve.  The engine seems powerful enough, if not a little slow at the rendering.  I am not sure if I will be using this one, but it does seem to be a lot of fun to play around with.  I also downloaded the unity engine, which is capable of a broader reach, though I fear that I will start to get sucked into the perfectionist status that I seem to be doing.  We will have to see which one I end up using after I play through some of the tutorials.

Today I worked one hour on this new passion project and found that I have a solid idea.  I was able to lay out some of the functionality of the main menu and what I want it to be able to do.  I need to continue to work through youtube videos in order to make sure that I am able to produce the code required for the project.  This week will be a bit more of the planning and learning phase of this game development.  I believe that I have a solid idea I just don't know where to begin which is causing a lot of stress.  I am excited to jump in and start coding some actual play of a game, but I know that in order to do it justice I need to slow down and make things work a little at a time.

Road Ahead:

• Learn how to model in Blender
• Start to layout and create buttons for the main menu UI
• Work through a tutorial for the Unity Engine
• Code the utility of the opening menu in the game
• Start to brainstorm starting zone
• Starting stats
• Starting gear
• experience points per level
• design.

I will keep you all posted on progress as I get where I need to get.  I thank you for coming in and joining me as I work through some of the kinks of being a brand new game designer.

The Day After Blizzcon!

I have a strange thing that I decided to do today, the day after BlizzCon.  I have been so inspired by the wonderful creations of, in my opinion, one of the best video game companies to exist, and downloaded a game design tool.  I am relatively new to coding, but have always had a lot of very creative ideas that float around in my head from time to time.

My latest idea has been used within the confines of a Dungeons and Dragons campaign that I have been building.  I don't want to go into too much detail but I thought this campaign would be amazing for a video game and so I have started to learn code in a way to bring this creation to the world.  I don't know why but the idea of creating something for the world is both very exciting and extremely terrifying as well.

I was talking to my wife as I started to learn all that I could about this game development software and said, "you know what? I think that even if I do sell a game, if it doesn't sell it could become a great addition to a portfolio."  I think that is what I am going to be doing.  I am going to be creating a hobby project and build a game that I have always wanted to play.  I will be working through the tutorials at the beginning to build up a skill set and from there I will be moving forward and kicking butt at game design.

I am always super excited after BlizzCon every year, but this year I feel a greater push towards becoming what I have always dreamt of becoming.  I will be a successful content creator and I am excited to be here and being a part of it with you all.

Getting Back Into the game

With all of my goals I have lost sight of what is important in my life.  I know this sounds like I am about to go all deep and start to show you all that I am a deeper and more thoughtful person, but no, the real reason I started this project is because I love video games.  This is a total shocker right?  Well it shouldn't be.  I have always loved games and the goals I set for myself makes it seem a little less for the love of the game and a little more for the love of my self promotion.  I want to apologize for looking at this community as a group of numbers rather than as a community.

That stops today!!!!!  I will not be sharing my weekly stats any more, I will not be pushing for people to follow or support me in any way, but I will be bringing straight content for the sake of content.   I recently have been given an opportunity to rediscover one of my favorite games through group content and have been having a blast doing so.  Oh man, I cannot tell you all enough how wonderful it has been to play these games and not feel alone in what I am doing.

If you want to check out our group playing these amazing games together head on over to twitch.tv/jpalm316 on Wednesday night at 8:00 pm mst.  We have been having a blast and my buddy John has been doing a great job putting together some amazing content for you all.

If you are bored on a Saturday morning or a Sunday afternoon swing on over to my channel at twitch.tv/wylesco for some fun laid back gaming.  We have been having a lot of fun working through the main story of Elder Scrolls Online as well as a few off streams of Stardew Valley.

I have been having a wonderful time learning more about myself and the gaming industry as a whole and look forward to many more opportunities as I progress through this great journey.  I have really enjoyed seeing how much I have grown these last few weeks and cannot wait to see where I go to in the future.

Day 32: Feelings, all we have are Feelings!!!!!

This is going to be a strange post.  I try not to do this but sometimes when you are so busy trying to put yourself out there, change your stars, or just overall work towards a better tomorrow you get caught up in all of your short comings.  I have been going down a rabbit hole of self doubt and battling the feelings of failure as they happen.  Today I was feeling that my head was above water finally when my wife hit me with the ten ton hammer of her own feelings of self doubt.  Oh boy what a crazy jerk those judgmental feelings can be, if you don't fend them off they have a way of coming in and wrecking all that is good in your life.  As we were talking I told my wife that what I do when the world is crashing down on me is mentally vomit all over a page through my writing.  I was honest in what I told her as that is what I normally do, though this last week I haven't been able to do so.  I feel that I have been too busy judging myself to put down some truth bombs on paper.  So here we go I am about to drop some truth bombs on this page.

The failures of January.

• I promised myself that I would write one post a day just to keep my head on straight, already I have failed that task.  Hopefully February is a little better.
• I promised myself that I was going to grind for 4 more followers on twitch and though I have had a lot of fun streaming I have gained a big whopping zero on the follower front.
• Twitter has told me that I am on an upward trend but every day I log on and see that more people have left my page, I'm silently judging myself on the fact that I don't have tough enough skin to just let it slide.
• social media is freaking hard.  I hate it but I love it at the same time
• I missed a week of streaming when I probably could have done it just fine.  

The successes of January.

(I like to end my mental vomit on a sweet note so that the acidity doesn't smell too bad.)

• I have stopped making excuses and have finally started to put myself out there.
• I have experienced an amazing uptick in creativity and am constantly looking for ways to improve myself
• I have met some amazing people on this journey so far and I look forward to meeting many more along the way.

Sometimes we are our own worst judges.  We take so much time telling ourselves that we are not good enough that we start to believe it.  If I had one wish it would be that everyone realizes that they are worthwhile and not a failure.  No matter the circumstances there is always something going right in our lives.

Day 27: Almost One Month down Eleven More To Go!

Alrighty folks, my goal of writing every day has not been going as well as possible as life has gotten in the way.  I have been pushing a lot of long hours and have been feeling the burnout that comes from doing a couple too many things at once.  That being said I have really enjoyed working towards my goals of becoming a better content creator, and that included writing on this website on a weekly basis.

So lets get caught up on the week up to this point.

I finally started training jiujitsu again.  It is really hard to go back onto the mat after being sick and after taking so much time off.  I felt like a brand new student again which made for a lot of fun, especially in the soreness I experienced after the first hard session back.  It was great to reconnect with all of my friends once more, jiujitsu really is a great community that I love being a part of.  I think my goal of getting to the next rank is a long ways off as I feel utterly useless as of right now, but I'll keep slowly increasing my time training until I feel I can make some grand strides in the sport once more.

At work we have started preseason track and field practice so my afternoons have started to fill up with coaching young men and women in the throwing disciplines.  I love coaching as it gives me an avenue to work my logic and reasoning skills to help others perform better.  Unfortunately we have had a lot of snow so we have been unable to go outside and throw, which has kept us working on technique and weight training.  I feel that we are making great progress though so I look forward to seeing how the kids do come regular season.  I do have a couple kids that are in the sport for the social atmosphere though so I will have to see how I can get them to compete to the best of their ability once the season starts.

My twitch streams are still going.  In fact the one I had yesterday might have been some of my best work yet.  I am still struggling with getting people to watch the stream but I know they will eventually come and enjoy the content that I am making.  I am really enjoying playing through vanilla Elder Scrolls Online once more.  I never actually finished the game before so this journey has been great for making me play through the story and see the entire game from start to finish.

I kind of touched on it early, but my fitness is finally starting to move forward once again.  I have been spending a little less time on my behind and a little more time walking and moving.   I feel that it is finally starting to make a difference because I feel a little more coordination in my movements and a little more energy in my day to day living.  I hope for some more growth this week as I really start to get to it and push myself to be that much healthier.

As always on these Sunday posts I like to end with my goal updates.  I have to admit that these are not moving as fast as I would like, but every day that I push myself to do this I will grow as a writer and a creator.  Thank you all again for taking the time out of your busy days to swing by and take a look, it means so much to me for the level of support I have been receiving from the community.

6/50 Twitch

250/300 Twitter  

12/20 YouTube

213.8/200  Weight  (Down 1.2 pounds this week.  Every day I'm getting closer to this goal.)

White belt/ Blue Belt  (went back to the gym this week which will help me to get where I want to be)

136/200 Instagram  (Not sure how but I have gained a couple of folks this week.  Thank you for the follows)

I don't normally do this but I do want to share my cousins blog with you all.  He is starting a new blog that chronicles his life as an urban gardener.  He is a very creative guy who has some amazing thoughts on life.  Definitely worth a quick check.

Day 20: A look ahead.

I am constantly being shown that people are decisive and unwilling to bend no matter how the facts seem to be shown to them.  I know that sounds very defeatist but it is the unfortunate reality of the life that we live in right now. I was out on a date with my wife last night when the video of the high school kids taunting an American Indian surfaced.  I know that people have released other videos trying to make the kids seem like good people but whether they were the ones that circled the others or they were being targeted I hate that we live in a society where people mock and berate others.  I don't know what that means for me or my goals, I just wanted to get off my chest the feeling that our government has created a series of monsters that seem to go wherever they can and don't listen to each other anymore.  While on this date I had the chance to look up some Fred Rogers quotes which made me remember that there was a time when people were being taught through the programming that they enjoy that everyone deserves to be treated with respect and love.

I find it very difficult to feel love all the time, especially as I am trying to up my internet presence and leaning towards some content creation.  I find myself going down these rabbit holes of hate and getting very disheartened at the aspect of keyboard warriors spouting their nonsense to all that come across it.  I know that I am in a dark place but this week has got me down.  I decided that I want to be positive in a world of negativity.  I believe that all people, all over the world, want the same thing.  They want to make themselves as happy as they can without others telling them that they are wrong for trying to be happy. I don't want to make anybody feel inferior for any reason, or make anybody feel that they are not good enough for whatever reason.

This is why I started to stream.  I decided that there are a lot of people in the streaming community that create content in a trolling way, that use their fame to put others down, and try and make others feel bad about trying to be the best that they can be.  I want to try and change that.  I believe that people are innately good and that by streaming in a positive way I will help grow a community that is also kind and genuinely wants to make a difference.  I want to challenge myself to do the same with my interactions on twitter this year and make it so people feel that they are blessed to have come across me in this life.

I know that this is a slightly different tone to most of my other posts but I do appreciate those of you that have stayed and read all the way to the end.  I look forward to bringing more content your way throughout the year and for many years to come.

6/50 Twitch

250/300 Twitter   (Lost one this week, Twitter really is a difficult medium)

12/20 YouTube

215/200  Weight  (One pound closer to my goals)

White belt/ Blue Belt

132/200 Instagram  (three less than last week, but I haven't been posting so I can understand the drop off)